48 Random Questions

Found originally via http://jrsblahg.blogspot.com/

I saw this on the site listed above and since I spent most of today away from my computer I figured I’d answer these questions and post this bad-boy as today’s blog post. So without further ado I present:

48 Random Questions

1) Who is your favorite television celebrity from the days of Black and White?
               Lucille Ball. That’s a no-brainer.
2) What is your favorite volume of the Encyclopedia Brittanica?
              M because it was the thickest.
3) If your life was a reality show, what would it be titled?
              Hollywood is Sad
4) What Biblical character would you be? 
              John The baptist because that’s the part I played in Godspell at Frenchwoods Summer
5) What is your favorite minority holiday?
               Passover
6) If you were a totem pole what animal would you be and where would you be positioned?
               Monkey in the middle.
7) Curtains or blinds? 
               Curtains, black-out curtains
8) What comes to mind when you smell dirty socks? 
                 That it’s well past time to do my laundry.
9) If you could choose any celebrity to be your roommate who would you choose? 
                Kevin Smith because we both like comics and movies and are kinda lazy
10) You invent a smoothie. What is in it? 
                Peanut Butter, banana, and chocolate. (you didn’t say it had to be healthy) 
11) If you were part of a balcony would you be the railing or the lounge chair? 
                This question is retarded. The railing cause who wants a bunch of ass on you all day?
12) If you could only use one cooking utensil for the rest of your life which utensil would it be? 
                Tongs.
13) What is the most ridiculous dance craze you've ever been a part of? 
                The Electric Slide or the “Shark-Dance” 
14) If you could name a hockey team what would you name it? 
                 The Texas Melters.
15) What's one invention you can't believe we didn't have until after landing a man on the moon?
                The internet.
16) What is the funniest pattern for a button up tourist shirt? 
                Dead babies.
17) If the world were backwards and animals owned humans, what kind of animal would you want to be your master? 
             Monkey.
18) If teleportation was possible to where would you most often teleport? 
              Megan Fox’s Shower.
19) What five items are a necessity in your hurricane survival kit?
              Water, a bong, weed, tissue (I blow my nose a lot) machete.
20) If your finger could dispense one condiment what condiment would you dispense? 
              Honey Mustard 
21) What is your ideal cracker flavor? 
               is Ritz a flavor? 
22) If you suddenly had wheels for feet what is the first thing you would do?
               scream, “What the fuck happened to my feet??”
23) One celebrity who is famous for a reason I still haven't discovered is Everyone on the Hills.
24) What is your favorite 1980's cartoon? 
                Super Friends 
25) What was your favorite after school show? 
                Tiny Tunes and Animaniacs.
26) What do you believe a training bra is training for? 
                This is stupid. Next question. 
27) If you could put a zipper on any article of clothing what article would you choose?
                 NEXT!
28) If you could scream anything at a bad driver what would it be? 
                 What do you mean “if”? (the answer is Fuck-Nozzle) 
29) What's your favorite animal that often appears in Native American folklore? 
                   Coyote.
30) If you could only use floor lamps for lighting your home for the rest of your life, how tall would you like the lamp to be? 
                   Six foot.
31) If you owned a cereal company what current cereal would you purchase to sell as your own?
                   Cheerios.
32) Money is no longer an object for you. What country do you buy? 
                   Jamaica.
33) If you could shrink any person and carry them in your pocket who would you shrink?
                   A hooker.
34) If people's knees bent the other direction what design would you give to chairs? 
               Who came up with these questions and how can I punch them?
35) You've been assigned to clean up an abandoned landfill. What's the first thing you do? 
                  Fill it in with concrete 
36) If you could make a pillow out of any material what would you choose? 
                   Boobs.
37) If you started your own airline what would you name it?
                   Sedation Air
38) To what one city would your airline refuse to fly? 
                   Miami 
39) If flowers weren't the norm for romanticism what item would you choose to symbolize love? 
                   Tacos.
40) How much midriff is too much? 
                   I’m keeping the answer answer the last guy wrote: “Depends on the midriff”
41) If money didn't exist what would you use for currency? 
                    Body Hair because I’d always have some.
42) If you were stuck on a bus with the Brady Bunch and they insisted on singing and taking requests what song would you request in hopes that it would be so good they couldn't follow their own act and would stop singing. 
                Come On Get Happy 
43) If male and female weren't the only two sexes what would you call the third and what would make them different?
                    Michael Jackson. (Oooooh BURN!)
44) You invent a new shape. What do you call it? 
                     Pee-poo Jim-Jam.
45) If your life mirrored that of "Friends" which recurring character would you want to show up for sweeps week? 
                      The hanukkah armadillo.
46) If you could eat at any television eatery which one would it be? 
                     Monk’s Cafe (cue Seinfeld music) 
47) If you could change your name to anything, to what would you change it?
                       Cletus.
48) If you could change any past decision in your life would you? 
                         Nah, that’s how paradox’s start…